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Infatuation Declares Spaceship Restaurant Vespertine a ‘Miserable, Dark Trap’

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It’s all part of a long Instagram story

Outside Vespertine
Matthew Kang
Farley Elliott is the Senior Editor at Eater LA and the author of Los Angeles Street Food: A History From Tamaleros to Taco Trucks. He covers restaurants in every form, from breaking news to the culture, people, and history that surrounds LA's dining landscape.

Local food site Infatuation LA got around to Vespertine last night for a meal, and they apparently didn’t take too kindly to the service, the food, the outfits, or the ambient noise that gets pumped into the dining room. In a series of Instagram story posts, the two dining companions managed to snap a few interior photos of the place (light saber table, anyone?) before apparently being scolded. They later snuck away for a couple of “whisper reviews” on property before leaving with some harsh parting thoughts.

First up, some rather dim shots of what to expect from Vespertine.

Inside Vespertine
Infatuation LA
A picture of the food
Infatuation LA

Those shots may have earned the team a scolding from staff though, as photos inside are either discouraged or disallowed entirely. And then there’s this:

Uh oh
Infatuation LA
That music
Infatuation LA

The Space Emperor is, of course, a reference to Jordan Kahn, who has previously called Vespertine a spaceship “with its own gravity.” The ambient music comes from the band This Will Destroy You, and is apparently pumped in without ceasing during the hours-long dinner.

So what’s the final verdict?

The last word on Vespertine by Infatuation
Infatuation LA

Ouch. Of course this isn’t the first early review of sorts to hit Vespertine. Yelpers have been on the place since day one, offering lofty praise for the high-minded restaurant. The Hollywood Reporter, however, sent one writer a single time before pumping out a review piece that called Vespertine “intentionally joyless” — and along the way they sparked a renewed debate about how much time to give a restaurant before reviewing it, especially one as pricey and hard to get into as Vespertine.

Oh, and for some not low-light images of the inside of the restaurant, they’re currently up on Eric Owen Moss’s own website (for now).